DUTERTE’S A JOKE….69

ON WAR IN MARAWI

“We have no US-made PATRIOT ANTI-MISSILE. Magdasal na lang tau na hindi mahulog ung NOKOR missile patungo Guam”-Sec Lorenzana

Nagpadala CHINA ng anti-missile nila–KWITIS…

KIM JONG UN to TRUMP, “Don’t worry Sir. Consider it as just a SPEEDING MISSILE!”

On Paolo Duterte’s hand in the P6.5B Customs shabu, “no more WHIFF, PROOF BEYOND REASONABLE DOUBT na”

 

“We now have two factions: MAGDALO where I belong and MAGKANO? where FAELDON GAMBALA and MAESTRECMPO belong”- Trillanes

 

“Resignation is one secret of LONGEVITY” Police Supt Jovie Espenido

 

The WIFE hires mercenary hot shot lawyers to enforce a SPEEDING TICKET? At Edsa? For P500M + 2 BGC Condo Units?

 

“Takot siya sa akin eh. Ewan ko. Kasi alam nyang hindi ako natatakot sa kanya. Lahat natatakot siguro niya, eh ako hindi ako takot sa kanya,” Lorna Kapunan told Rappler in a phone interview on Wednesday, August 9.

“Eh sino nmn hindi matatakot sa hitsura nya?” tanong ni Chairman Andy.

 

 

An ITEM in DIVINA LAW OFFC VOUCHER: CO(MO)LLECT FEES

 

Wife reveals her estranged husband has THIRD BALL…

 

“Patricia is a very gifted person. Meron siyang tinatawag na third eye. She belongs to a gifted society called X-MEN!” her lawyer Atty Lorna Kapunan, who lost in the 2016 senatorial elections, told ABS-CBN News.

 

While in Quezon City, AERIAL BOMBS at TIMES ST? In case of error, baka sumabog sa LA VISTA?

 

Whiff of scandal: Polong Duterte owns Customs

 

“Malaki bank account n’ya…Maliit nmn ATM n’ya” the poor wife Patricia Bautista said of her estranged hubby

 

“Hell hath no FURY like a COMELEC CHAIRMAN scorned”…Rody

 

Inquirer has BUCKLED Other media outfits follow suit

EGGIE APOSTOL MAX SOLIVEN CHINO ROCES would have reacted differently

 

Women with less attractive partners are much happier—study

“Kaya pala HAPPY si Bossing Vic at Rody” ika ni Pacman

 

Donald Trump’s approval rating dips to 33% whereas Rody’s up at 82%. In a fit of hubris the latter says, “Trump has no Martial Law option, 16M trolls, buckling press, rubber stamp Congress, and soon, a puppet Judiciary…”

 

2 babae na nagtago ng droga sa maselang bahagi, timbog

PDEA: SHABURO—High grade

 

“Ung P6.5B Customs Shabu pang TANIM un ng PNP for the nxt 5 years” ika ni Kenneth Duremdes

 

Louder howler monkeys developed smaller testicles, says study. Ernie Abella says that shortly the President tones down his voice

 

Parojinogs tried to bribe me with ‘a sack of P100 bills’ – Espenido

“BARYA kasi! Iba usap kung P1k bills” ika ni Marvin Marcos

 

Ben Diokno: “Free education benefits the individual, not society”

Mocha: “Agree. We need to double the 16M to 32M by 2022”

 

On the recent arrest of a Catholic priest in the company of a 13-year old in a Motel. “Si JALOSJOS pala PARI rin?” ‘ika nung pulis.

 

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