DUTERTE’S a joke…50

de-lima-pornDuterte responsible if something happens to me, De Lima says-News

“Pagkatapos ng PILA BALDE, kay Boss n’ya isisisi? Pambihira!” Salvador Panelo sighed.

http://news.abs-cbn.com/video/news/01/10/17/duterte-responsible-if-something-happens-to-me-de-lima-says


jack lammmm“If indeed Jack Lam, through his middleman Wally Sombero, attempted to bribe Sec Vit Aguirre, why didn’t the latter effect right then and there a warrantless arrest of Sombero, the latter being in flagrante delicto, and thereafter promptly move to prevent Lam’s departure or escape from the country?” Leila De Lima said in a statement.

The President asked that also but was convinced by Aguirre’s reply. “Boss, baka manlaban eh. At baka masabunutan ako!”

http://newsinfo.inquirer.net/860756/de-lima-senate-should-probe-bi-bribery-scandal


The pain became more acute every time Jinggoy rises from a seating position, and despite rest and medications, the disturbance felt on his knee still won’t go away.

His doctor said he has patello femoral pain syndrome, and has recommended that he undergo an MRI and x-ray to better assess his condition.

Jinggoy was used to having cash-filled pockets and that put a strain on his knees.

http://news.mb.com.ph/2017/01/09/jinggoy-allowed-to-undergo-hospital-checkup-on-jan-10/


Church displays ‘Do not kill’ banner during Black Nazarene festivities- ABS-CBN NEWS

“Oro” producer readies a statement that no DOG was slaughtered during its filming….

http://news.abs-cbn.com/video/news/01/09/17/church-displays-do-not-kill-banner-during-black-nazarene-festivities


And in the midst of all this, Biz Buzz learned that a representative of Limay Mayor Lilvir Roque actually called on Ramon Ang, who heads Petron’s parent firm San Miguel Corp., a day before the complaints against the company hit mainstream media.

“Patay kang Mayor ka. ‘Di ba n’ya alam na Financier ni Presidente si RSA last elections?” Bong Go notes.

https://business.inquirer.net/222690/biz-buzz-welcome-club-petron


In a message during the observance of the Black Nazarene Traslacion, President Duterte said his administration deeply empathizes with the faith of Catholic devotees of the Black Nazarene who “resort to sacrifice every single day, while still finding a piece of themselves to honor God.”

Gen Bato added, “dami sumama kahit nabawasan sila ng 7000.”

http://newsinfo.inquirer.net/860578/duterte-urges-black-nazarene-devotees-to-pray-for-ph


The hashtag #LeniLeaks trended in social media platforms, as the emails traded among US-based businesswoman Loida Nicolas-Lewis, her sister Imelda Nicolas, former Commission on Filipinos Overseas chairperson, and other Robredo supporters were shared online.

Mocha, Joey Salceda and Harriet Roque admit that they have monthly leaks too. “May cramps ako sa Period ko. Ano tawag dun?” Joey asks. “Dysmenorrhea, gaga!” Mocha replied. On his part, Harriet said, “irregular ako.” “Ate, baka buntis ka?” Kokai Pimentel quips.

http://cnnphilippines.com/news/2017/01/09/robredo-lenileaks-loida-lewis-imelda-nicolas-oust-duterte.html


Senate President Aquilino “Koko” Pimentel III sees nothing wrong with lawmakers identifying pet projects for inclusion in the national budget for funding as long as they do not interfere in their implementation, which is barred under the 2013 Supreme Court decision that declared the pork barrel system unconstitutional.

Mocha joined the fray. “Petting is ok. It’s Necking that I intend to ban on Prime Time TV….”

http://newsinfo.inquirer.net/860900/pimentel-whats-wrong-with-pet-projects


MANILA — Former drug addicts who surrendered under the police’s Oplan Tokhang will join the Black Nazarene procession on Monday (Jan. 9) in hopes to usher two kinds of changes: the public perception on drug addicts and the perception on how policemen handle surrenderers.

They are welcome to the newly minted IGLESIA NI RODY where, according to its founder, one can do anything. “Matindi ang paper ni Mocha dahil sa INR may gender equality. Si Mocha ang First Cardinal at si Rody ang First Pope.”

“Papa! Papa! Papa!”

http://newsinfo.inquirer.net/860452/100-rehabilitated-drug-users-join-black-nazarene-rites


Malacañang and Congress have quietly kept alive the graft-ridden pork barrel system—declared unconstitutional by the Supreme Court four years ago—in this year’s P3.35-trillion national budget, Sen. Panfilo Lacson said on Sunday.

Sec Ben Diokno denies there is pork in this year’s GAA. “Tama nga naman wala pork barrel. Pero binago nila. Ginawa nilang BULALO BARREL” a fuming Ping Lactating said.

http://newsinfo.inquirer.net/860490/palace-congress-hit-for-keeping-pork


Manong Chavit Singson on the Miss U contest to be staged here, said, “I have financed this project not to make money but to help promote the country’s image so that we may become a favorite tourist destination, thus contributing to the economy and the appreciation of our country and our people. I wish every Filipino could experience the coronation night live. It is a once-in-a-lifetime experience, and tickets are easily available in all SM outlets.”

Chavit bans James Taylor’s hit song “You’ve Got A Friend” in the pageant; EJK moratorium at least in the whole month of January; and a Gag Order on the President.

http://lifestyle.inquirer.net/249964/happened-gloria-diaz-margie-moran-miss-u-reigns/


Millennials, like each generation that was young before them, tend to attract all kinds of ire from their elders for being superficial, self-obsessed, anti-intellectuals. But a study out today from the Pew Research Center offers some vindication for the younger set. Millennials are reading more books than the over-30 crowd, Pew found in a survey of more than 6,000 Americans.

In PH, Millenials are set to out-pace their elders in the use of expletives. Sooner, they will be deluged with shows awash with adult content courtesy of the newly-minted MTRCB Board Member. “Balik na po ang Penekulang Pilipino. Ginagawa na po ang prequel ng ”Uhaw’ at ‘Dingding Lang Ang Divider’.” ‘ika ni Amay Bisaya.

http://www.theatlantic.com/technology/archive/2014/09/millennials-are-out-reading-older-generations/379934/


“That’s not true. There is no pork barrel. There is no PDAF (Priority Development Assistance Fund) in the budget. There are no post-enactment projects in the budget,” Davao City Rep. Karlo Alexei Nograles said.

It’s like Lydia’s Lechon telling us their ROAST PIG has no cholesterol.

http://newsinfo.inquirer.net/859796/no-pork-lacson-told


President Rodrigo Duterte has appointed self-styled “sex guru” Mocha Uson to serve on the board of a state agency tasked with shielding Filipinos from immorality and excessive violence in film and television, sparking a firestorm of protests on social media.

“Indie aficionado si Mocha. Indie nila magets ang gusto ni Presidente. Indie nila alam ang plano ni Mocha sa Film Industry. Indie na gagawa ng penekula. Indie feel ni Mother Lily…..” Tito Sotto said.

http://newsinfo.inquirer.net/859770/sex-guru-appointed-to-mtrcb


Rody allows Jack Lam to return, on 3 conditions:

  1. Make Cara y Cruz Sakla and Pula Puti regular games in Fontana
  2. Introduce JUETENG in the Mainland to be operated solely by Bong Pineda
  3. “Bong, pwede ba pustahan yung Palayuan ng Jingle?”

http://www.philstar.com/headlines/2017/01/03/1659064/rody-allows-jack-lam-return-3-conditions


Asked why Mocha Uson was named to the state agency (MRTCB) created to review films and TV programs, Sec Martin Andanar said: “Why not?”

“Who now classifies Mocha?” asked Leni Robredo.

https://entertainment.inquirer.net/211515/palace-on-mocha-usons-appointment-to-mtrcb-why-not


KAMPALA, Uganda — Fourteen people were killed when a taxi swerved to avoid a cow and crashed into two large vehicles on what is known as Uganda’s deadliest road, police said Wednesday.

Nine other people had serious injuries. The cow also died.

“It’s rare, but it wasn’t well done….” a Chef on the scene mused.

https://www.facebook.com/sonny.pulgar


Religious experiences have a similar effect on the brain as taking drugs, according to a new study.

“So that’s the reason why Rody blasts the Pope and the Bishops on a daily basis.” Soc Villegas observes.

http://www.independent.co.uk/news/science/religious-effect-brain-drugs-mormon-utah-reward-centre-nucleus-accumbens-a7446301.html


“Ang ayaw ko, tuloy-tuloy ang pagpatay, ang pulis walang nasosolve, hindi ko gusto ‘yan. Ayaw ko ‘yung sa Caloocan, ‘yung pitong tao na pinatay sa bahay, kahit na sabihin na drug pusher ‘yan, dapat hanapin kung sino ang pumatay,” Dick Gordon said in an interview with Radyo Inquirer 990AM.

“Akala kasi ni Rody, Kagawad ka ng Davao City. No talk, Agree Only.” Leila kibitzed.

http://newsinfo.inquirer.net/859292/gordon-dismayed-over-unsolved-killings-urges-sc-to-form-special-courts


 

 

 

 

 

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