DUTERTE jokes….part 2

junkiesThe President is happy to have christened his 16.6M or 38% who voted for him as DUTERTE JUNKIES.This new meaning attributed to JUNKIE is added up to the new words he invented like CHUKCHAK, SHABULIZED, MATRIXIZED, DURIANIZED, MARIZISED, PUTANGINIZED, etc. hehe
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Martin-AndanarMartin “The Caveman” Andanar issues a CLARIFICATION. Referring to the PDI’s headline the JUNKIES the President was quoted as saying, they are not the 16.6M or 38% who voted for him. MALIWANAG? hehe

“‘KING INA! BOBOBO nyo!” pahabol ni Andanar (referring to those OUTSIDE the 16.6M or 38% who voted for his Boss)

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helicopterThe reason why DU30’s visit to Pampanga was cancelled according to Marciano Paynor, chief of the Presidential Protocol Office was allegedly due to bad weather. “The pilots made two roving flights. But clouds 400 feet high south of here were heavy and it was raining very hard. The pilot advised that the helicopter could not proceed safely,” Paynor informed newsmen at the area.

The real reason though was that they received an intel that one of the chopper pilots might be the latest amore of Sen Leila, a helicopter aficionada, as disclosed by the President.

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mike-arroyoAnother reason why the Pampanga trip was cancelled was somebody close to President Duterte informed the latter that the former saw the former FIRST GENTLEMAN logging reams of papers that look like GOVERNMENT CONTRACTS for the President’s signature. “Para naman sa legal expenses namin.”

gma du30When GMA learnt of the cancellation she was heard cussing “TANAY DAMO KA MIKE. GUSTO MO MAKABAWI KA AGAD. MASYADO PA MAAGA, CONO!” hehe

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wolf whistlingDuterte: (In a Press Con, thundering) “Dont FUCK with me!….”

Mariz Umali: ” Eh di Wag mo!”

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d5 du30Sen Leila de Lima was seen at Nichols Air Base recently.When asked why shes there, she replied that shes looking for a Pilot-Instructor. “I want to hone my helicopter skills…….”

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Why did DU30 require DoJ Sec Vit Aguirre to don a hair piece? The Prez doesnt want to be reminded of his predecessor from Tarlac.

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“De Lima, mahusay ‘mag-helicopter” – Duterte

“NAPAKASINUNGALING MO PANGULONG DUTERTE! Therere snippets of truth na may DRIVER SWEET LOVER at HAGAD SAGAD ako. pero so far, wala akong PILOTO GUAPITO….”

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tolentinoNagselos kay De Lima si Ex-MMDA Chief Francis Tolentino kaya niya binuko si Warren….

“Ex na tau Warren..” txt ni Tolentino.

“no hard feelings, Frances…” sagot ni Warren.

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